Youngest Daughter

Today is Youngest Daughter's second birthday.  At this age, she doesn't understand what having a birthday means, but she does recognise that Oldest Daughter thinks it's a big deal.  As she is too young to fully enjoy this day as her special day, today's post is going to be a little different.  I am going to memorialise her birthday, by talking about me.

After Oldest Daughter was born, we had absolutely no intention of having any more children.  We had waited thirteen years for Oldest Daughter to come along and we were content with our one perfect child.  "One and Done" was the phrase we uttered any time anyone asked us if we were trying for another.

But the universe had other plans for our little family.  When I found out I was pregnant again, it threw me for a loop.  And by loop I mean that I felt like a freight train had run me over.  Over and over and over for about three months.  That is how long it took me to accept the fact that our family was about to expand.  I'm not sure why I had such a difficult time accepting our new and revised future.  Maybe it's because I was so grounded in the belief that our family was whole and that this curveball forced me to re-think all of my truisms.  I had to answer, in my head and in my soul, all the nagging questions that a second child brings up.  Would I be able to handle two children?  Would I be able to love the second child as much as the first child?  Would I be able to mother without favouritism?  Would Oldest Daughter resent me for giving her a sibling?  I somehow worked out all of these dilemmas and once I did, I enjoyed the remainder of my pregnancy with Youngest Daughter.  Well, as much as you can enjoy pregnancy.

Now that Youngest Daughter has been a part of this family for the past two years, I cannot imagine life without her.  She has the most beautiful smile and the most wonderful spirit.  She is mischievous, to the point that I cannot let her out of my sight for just a minute; she is loving, always wanting to blow you kisses or wrap her little arms tightly around your neck and give you a hug that makes you want to wish time would stop - just so that you can savour that hug for one moment longer.

I am so proud of Oldest Daughter.  She is such a great big sister.  Yes, they do fight a bit, but it always ends with a hug.  She looks out for Youngest Daughter, trying to ensure she is always safe.  When we are out with others, everyone knows who Oldest Daughter's little sister is.  They are on their way to making each other their future best friends.

At the beginning, I said this post was going to be about me.  Even when I have that intention, I somehow manage to make it all about her.  That's alright.  As Youngest Daughter's mom, today is a day for me to celebrate the beautiful little girl I was allowed to bring into this world.  So her birthday celebration is equal parts her day and equal parts my day.  Even if my part of the celebration plays out only in my heart.  JCMT