School

A week and a half ago, Oldest Daughter started the Second Grade.  As excited as I was for her and the new adventures waiting for her right around the corner, I will admit that I also harbored a bit of sadness.  Sadness that my firstborn was growing up before my eyes; sadness that there wasn't a darn thing I could do to stop it.  


So today, my mixed bag of emotions greeted me with the alarm.  Youngest Daughter was starting Preschool.  


As we started the Preschool countdown by marking off each day on the calendar, equal parts enthusiasm and dread settled in my heart.  Every passing day saw these two emotions growing just a tiny bit bigger .  But I knew this little girl has been ready to start school (so that she could be just like her big sister) for at least the past year.  For this reason alone, I swallowed the dread and decided to only be excited for her.


As we marked off the days counting down to the start of Preschool, I marked off the days for a different reason.  Today was the start of Youngest Daughters adventures in schooling, but for me, it was the day I started to believe that my baby was growing up.  I have known she was growing up all along, but up until now, I chose to ignore it.  But not anymore.  She is my baby, and will always be my baby, and as a mom that just sent her last fledgling out into the world, I am allowing myself one morning to miss my little buddy.  Knowing how much fun she will be having over the next year, I will not hang onto my feelings of loss.  Instead, I will look forward to hearing her stories, learning her new songs and reveling in her new-found skills.


At Preschool drop-off, as I looked around us, I saw so many of the children in the throes of separation anxiety.  Not my little trooper.  Youngest Daughter kissed Handy Hubby and I good-bye, found her desk and started rolling out play-doh.  She did not shed a tear, nor waste time glancing back at us.  She just moved forward like the independent little girl we have always known she was.  Now the only emotion I'm feeling is proud!  JCMT

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