No More Rushing
I grew up in a home where my father always said "On time is late - early is on time". We lived by that code. We worked by that code. To this day, when we ask my father to join us at 2pm, he will show up at 1:30pm (sometimes even earlier!). I love this about him as well as I love that that was an ethic he chose to pass down to me. And I have learned that lesson well - if my appointment is for 2pm, I will show up no later than 1:45pm.
Now just having said that, being the mother to two small children and needing to be someplace by a specific time - these two things do not always mix. Like never. Both of my girls are at the age that the world around them is fascinating. The weed growing between the cracks of a sidewalk must be investigated. Oh how that has irritated me!! More than irritation, it has stressed me. I hate being stressed. I will admit that I have a slight temper. And I will also admit that when I am stressed, I like to yell. Well, "like" is probably not the right word. I choose to yell. At the time, it feels like the appropriate response. Yes, I know it's not. Stress causes me to do other things I know aren't right as well - drive too fast; drive erratically; yell obscenities at other drivers that have slighted me (when there are kids in the car, the words never leave the inside of my head); drop things; and bump into things. All of these things add to my stress, and it makes my Littles feel bad and probably a little scared of their mommy. All around - not good!
I have, over the last few weeks, come to a conclusion. Stress should have no place in my life, and I have been giving it too much of a foothold lately. It needs to be removed. Now I do realise that I cannot completely eradicate it from my life, but I need to be able to control it. So, how do I do this?
There will be no more rushing. Why is it necessary to make them hurry? If the appointment is at a hard and fast time, I need to leave the house a little earlier than normal. I want my children to be able to enjoy the sunshine on their faces, to be able to smell the flower or watch the bee collecting nectar. I need to be able to eliminate the words "hurry up" from my vocabulary. These are their years of wonder and I am doing them a disservice by robbing them of those opportunities as well as saddling them with a cranky mother. I am also missing out in getting to share these experiences with them. When was the last time you stopped to watch a beetle slowly walking across the sidewalk or a bird chase a cricket? These are times to share with my girls, to revel in the giggles watching these things can bring on.
Stress can be eliminated in other areas of my life as well. I am learning to say "no" when I feel that my, or my girls, schedules are in danger of overflowing. In some instances, this new approach has not been met with understanding, but I have to do what I feel is right for my family unit.
Another way to reduce stress is to ask for help. I will admit that this area is a constant struggle for me. Asking for help does not come natural to me, but I have also realised that as sickness has taken its' toll on my family this year, asking for help is just one more way of helping myself, which ultimately helps the family. And by asking for help, it has not made me less of a mother, or wife, just a less stressed mother and wife.
My advice to you - stop rushing. Today is the only today you are going to get. Enjoy it. Savor it. Stop pushing through it just to get through it. Make it a day worth remembering - for yourself as well as for your kids. JCMT
